What the Hell Is A Munch??


What Exactly Goes On At The CUFS Munch?  

        At one of our first Munch meetings, we met a young woman who was attending for the first time.  She had much to say, and made a great impression on us all.  After the Munch, she confided to us that she was "terrified" to attend.  She had actually planned to attend a few months earlier, but, in her words, "chickened out." 

        Why??  She didn't know what to expect, or what would happen at a meeting.  She was worried she would have to 'do' something (play or serve).....or would be expected to act her as a submissive to all present. 

         We have heard these fears before........... Sooooooo.............in the interest of making everyone who is having doubts comfortable, we are going to let you all in on exactly what a munch is.   :)

         Our friend in Boston, SubStephen, describes a munch as "a casual, non-play, social gathering of people interested in alternative sexuality, including BDSM  (B&D = Bondage & Discipline, D/S = Dominance/Submission, S&M = Sadomasochism), sexual fetishes, and adult fantasy roleplay." 

         Boy....he pegged it!

         Munches are casual.  Wear your jeans.  Wear your favorite Loony Tunes T-shirt.  Wear whatever you wore to work  (unless you are a Pro-Domme....then wear whatever YOU wear to the mall  <grin>) Bring your interested spouse, S.O., friend, neighbor, whoever.  They do not have to belong to CUFS....they just have to be interested.

         Munches are non-play events.  Oh man....if you could see some of the questions we have gotten about this! 

         When we first started the CUFS Munch and we used to meet at the Maine Mall, we had somebody ask us once "Doesn't security bother you when you are whipping someone in the food court??" 


        Munches are strictly social.  So....What do we talk about?  All kinds of stuff.  Upcoming events and parties....couples who are dating or looking for partners ..... references on possible partners.....the great shoes somebody picked up on sale.....Politics......child rearing.....etc.  You get the point.  We talk about everything.  Have a question about how a D/s toy works?  We discuss it.  Looking for the best sushi in Portland.....we get into that, too.   :)

        Munches are a social gathering of people interested in alternative sexuality.  Interested in Pony play?  Bondage?  Foot Worship?  This is your place.  Interested in stamp collecting?  This is probably not the group for you.....although a few of us could tell you a few interesting places to paste them.  :)

         An average CUFS Munch goes like this:  we walk in and get coffee, juice, soda, etc.  We talk about everything perverted and not perverted under the sun.  We have a set discussion and sometimes an impromptu discussion. We get silly - we get serious.  We order more coffee.  We laugh and joke and occasionally get a bit rowdy.  We look at our watches and say "Wow!! Look what time it is!!"  We all head home. 

         Sounds kinky....huh??

         But not every Munch is alike: some are held at a local shopping mall food court and are primarily social events.  Some are held in restaurants, and may or may not be just social - they may include a meeting or sharing of information.  Some Munches are held at private BDSM clubs with a play party following.  Sometimes, if the weather is good, they are held in parks or at the beach. 

        Often, many states, like Massachusetts and New York, will have a variety of Munches held on different days in different locations.  This allows you to attend and sample each one and decide which forum is the most comfortable for you.

        If you would like to take a 'first step' into the real time BDSM community, a Munch is the perfect way to get started.  Don't be shy...don't be worried. Attending a Munch has it's advantages.....  And the best benefit.....meeting others who think and feel just like you!!  :)

 Copyright Mistress Ren and LesVoiles 2000


A Brief History of Munches

By Todd H.  ©
Reprinted with permission


            The Munch has become a way to meet folks that are into BDSM in an informal and hassle-free environment. Usually the setting for a "munch" is a restaurant or coffee shop or similar environment. Munches have become a common occurrence nationwide (and in a few cases…worldwide) thanks to the Internet.

            However, some of you may not know that the custom of Munches (AKA "Burger Munches") started in the San Francisco Bay Area. In the early 90s, occasionally there were informal dinner gatherings of Bay Area folk into SM, but these were sporadic and not regular events. One day (sometime around April, 1992), a woman named Stella who posted regularly to the Usenet newsgroup, alt.sex.bondage, posted an article to the group saying she would be at Kirk's in Palo Alto (a hamburger take-out restaurant) that evening and that anyone wishing to join her was welcome.

            She felt that it would be useful to have a regular weekly predictable get-together, so that folks would not have to remember which day, what location, but could just head on over to the same place at the same time every week. Several people did show up that night and hence the concept of the Munch was born.


A "Mini-FAQ" About Munches:

By Searcher ©
Reprinted with permission



What's A Munch?

          A munch is a gathering of Scene-friendly people, usually at mealtime.


Why Should I Go To This One?

          If you're new to the Scene, or just slightly curious about this type of play, a munch in a public place is a safe, non-threatening way to check out some like-minded people. You can watch us from a distance and not even introduce yourself, if you like.


What Sort Of People Show Up At These?

          It varies from week to week. Ages range from early twenties through late fifties. All genders, sexual orientations, and BDSM preferences have probably been represented at one time or another.


Is There Any Play At The Munch?

          Nope. Occasionally, someone brings a toy to show off discreetly, but that's as far as it goes. Wear what you'd normally wear to a coffee shop.


So What Goes On At The Munch?

          People sit around and talk.  Some drop in for a short time, others stay until later.  Some of the talk is related to the scene, some isn't.  Some people get drinks or food, others don't.


How Will I Recognize The Group?

          Some groups hang balloons; some use a very discreet sign, such as a flower.

  Page Updated 08/27/05


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