Coastal United Fetish Society - Maine

Established 1997
a Maine Nonprofit Corporation


Afraid you are the only person in Maine or New Hampshire with "Special Interests?" 

Having a hard time meeting people who share your unique desires?

Want to learn about personal safety and meet others like you in a comfortable and safe environment?

CUFSmaine is a support, social, education, and safety group serving the Maine, New Hampshire, and New England BDSM community.

CUFSmaine is a pansexual, 18 years of age + group, open to all those experienced, new, or simply curious about the BDSM - Alternative Lifestyle community, including the Gay, Lesbian Bi, and Transgender communities.

CUFSmaine does not discriminate on the basis of gender, sexual orientation, legal age (over 18), race, color, ancestral origin, physical or mental handicaps, political affiliations, or religious beliefs.

CUFSmaine is associated with the NELA (New England Leather Association ) and is a member of NESMA (New England S/M Activists) and the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF).

CUFSmaine's Mission Statement


       CUFSmaine does NOT endorse or tolerate any activities that are NON-Consensual. 

These include harassment, rape, partner abuse (physical and emotional), stalking, assault, kidnapping, intimidation, detaining someone against their will, pedophilia, necrophilia, and zoophilia.

We take a VERY tough stand on these issues!

Have questions?  For further information, please click here.






CUFSmaine Honors Our American and British Soldiers


And Come Home Soon!



Welcome Home Dan!!!

Thank you for your service to our Country!




CUFSmaine is Proud to Support...


Lifestyle Abuse Survivors Together ©  Support and Unity for Abuse Survivors Everywhere.
Lifestyle Abuse Survivors Together ©


Proud Member of the Equality Project   


                                            awareness ribbon image

                         Support Sexual Assault Awareness              Support Domestic Violence Awareness

 This Organization proudly supports Maine and New Hampshire Sexual Assault Centers and Domestic Violence Agencies.

Know the difference between loving, consensual relationships and abuse.

For more information, read our BDSM vs. Abuse pamphlet.



Proud Supporter of

The National Leather Association - International's Domestic Violence Project



aids12.gif - 3.0 K


In Memory of our Brothers and Sisters, who have gone before us.



Welcome back to the site! 

Big Changes at CUFSmaine!

By Mistress Ren

It's time to get CUFSmaine up and running in New Hampshire, our new home base! 
And we have some BIG changes in store.....

Starting with....our NAME!!

We are in the process of transitioning 'CUFSmaine' to 'CUFSnorth'

A name better representative of the region in which we plan to provide education, support, and outreach - Maine, New Hampshire, and  eventually Vermont.  :)

Our first order of business is updating the website, which has grown rather complex and dull with age!  We have already secured the domain name of CUFSnorth, and switched to our new server.  lafayette - resident website guru - has already begun the transfer of the old website to a more modern and easier to navigate site.  Our new server offers a number of exciting extras that we haven't had access to prior - look for a forums area, chat areas, guest book, and possibly a blogging area to be added to the new site!

Currently, the new site is not yet published, but keep your eyes open for the new!    :)  As always, if you have an article you think we might be interested in, please drop us an email and let us know - we are always looking for informative articles, links, and member submissions.

We have already established our new email address at , and will continue to keep the old email address of  active until folks catch on.  :) 

Eventually, we will also have email access directly to the new website.....both lafayette and I, as well as our organization's advisors, will have personal email addresses at  We will also be offering personal email accounts at the organization to individuals who choose to subscribe to a CUFSmaine membership.....

Similar to our prior membership, the new membership will offer discounts to CUFSnorth classes as well as BDSM events throughout New England, and money collected will once again go to support the organization's outreach and education work.....but there will be other perks to membership, including a personal mailbox at  Details to be announced in the months ahead!

Like CUFSmaine, CUFSnorth's primary goals will be the education BDSMers in safety and technique, education of the vanilla public regarding BDSM practices, and outreach to regional hospitals, police departments, crisis centers, and other social service organizations.  As soon as our busy schedules allow, we will be applying for NH State incorporation so that we may resume our non-profit status.

Many folks have asked us if we will be offering a Munch in New Hampshire.  We have not yet decided if a Munch will be a part of our new organization, as New Hampshire already hosts a number of munches across the state.  We will keep everyone informed.

We will be closing down our CUFSmaine PO Box, which is currently located in Northern New Hampshire.  The box will be reestablished under the name of CUFSnorth at a future date when we relocate our home and the organization to central NH.

We will also be closing down the CUFSmaine_BDSM_Forum, currently located on Yahoo! Groups.  As you all know, Yahoo! has been a royal pain of late, closing down adult sites without warning.  Our new website will allow us to have a true forums section (similar to that on, catering to different aspects of the scene, and giving kinksters more of a choice of the areas in which they would like to participate.

We look forward to continuing our work for the BDSM community, and hope that you are as excited about the new changes as we are - as always, your ideas, input, and comments are greatly appreciated!   :)

In Leather,

Renee and Joe Cabaup
Mistress Ren and lafayette{Ren}


The CUFSmaine Website Index


What Does CUFSmaine Have to Offer?
Incentives and information on how to JOIN CUFSmaine as a MEMBER or attend classes, Munches, etc. on a pay per visit basis. <memberships are currently on hold as we reorganize the organization - thank you>

CUFSmaine Member Discount Card FAQ
Information on vendors, partners, and the discount card in general.

The CUFSmaine Shirts! 
Embroidered Polo shirts, Embroidered T-shirts, and our infamous Lobster shirts and Nightshirts!

Supporting CUFSmaine: 
Ways you can help the organization flourish 

CUFSmaine Classes
Information on upcoming classes and lectures.

What About Play Parties? 
Your questions answered!

Who are the Members of the Board of Trustees? 
Meet the Trustees of CUFSmaine

The New England Safe Call Network:  
CUFSmaine members volunteering as safe calls for YOU.

CUFSmaine Volunteer Mentors
Experienced players offering advice, assistance etc. to newbies
~~ Updated 8-23-05 ~~

Newsletter Archive
Past issues of the CUF Link.        ~~ Updated 11-29-05 ~~

We get a lot of great and funny mail.  We would like to share some of the best with you!       
~~ Updated 10-24-05 ~~

CUFSmaine/CUFSnorth's History
How it all began, and our plans for the future of the organization

Webrings, Awards and Memberships: 
Our itty bitty brag page.  :)

September 11, 2001 Memorial Page
Remembering those who were lost.


BDSM in New England: 

BDSM and Fetish Clubs
Places to play        ~~ Updated 10-18-05 ~~

BDSM Organizations and Support Groups
Find one near you!        ~~ Updated 10-18-05 ~~

BDSM Shopping
Places to purchase toys, clothing, and more!

Made In New England
New England made toys and BDSM implements!  Buy locally and support your sadistic New England craftsmen!        ~~ Updated 8-23-05 ~~

Kink Friendly Professionals and Services in New England
Lawyers, Physicians, counselors, etc.

The Maine/New Hampshire Safe Call Network:  
CUFSmaine members volunteering as safe calls for YOU.

New England BDSM Listservs and Boards
Discussion boards for those interested in BDSM and fetishes       
~~ Updated 10-18-05 ~~

New England Munches:  
Listing of non-play social events in New England.        ~~ Updated 11-18-05 ~~


BDSM Basics

Basic BDSM Etiquette
Our guide to proper BDSM behavior.

BDSM Contracts: 
(Under Construction)

BDSM Flags, Symbols and Hanky Codes:
Their meanings and creators.

BDSM Resume for submissives        ~~ New 10-26-05 ~~
By Mistress Ren

Information for Newbies: 
(Under Construction)

(Under Construction)

(Under Construction)

(Under Construction)

The Top Ten Breeches of BDSM Etiquette        ~~ New 9-1-05 ~~
By Mistress Ren

The Universal 1 - 10 Intensity Code: 
A standard and widely recognized code used to gage intensity levels and comfort when sceneing.


BDSM and the Law 

An explanation of Laws in Maine and New Hampshire that are of concern to those of us practicing BDSM and alternative lifestyles.

Maine Laws
New Hampshire Laws

    Under Construction - Info coming soon!


BDSM and Health  

        Emergency Training for SM Practitioners
        By Jay Wiseman

        The Medical Realities of Breath Control Play
        By Jay Wiseman

        Physiology of Alcohol Enemas
        By Jay Wiseman

        Safe Sex: 
        Information on various safe sex topics.


Book Reviews:

        Nonfiction and Reference

        Fiction and Fantasy


Crisis Support / Emergency Information:

Emergency Assistance Hotlines and Information
For assistance with Domestic Abuse, Rape, Stalking, AIDS testing, etc.


Current Events:

        BDSM Events
        Calendar of BDSM/Alternative Lifestyle gatherings and events for New England and beyond.


The Dominants' Page:

Our resource center for experienced and novice Dominants, including essays, educational material, and helpful links to other Dominant focused websites and resources.  (Under Construction)


Educational Articles:

The BDSM Lifestyle: 
A Basic Analysis of The Sadomasochistic Lifestyle And The People Involved, by Mistress Ren.

By Maddy

The Top Ten Myths About BDSM and the People Who Practice It:  
By Mistress Ren

Traveling with Toys: 
By Mistress Ren 



All 'Men' Are Created Equally (Or….Why I Don't Believe in Female Superiority): 
By Mistress Ren

Community Apathy        ~~ New 10-31-05 ~~
By Mistress Ren

Enema Play        ~~ New 9-1-05 ~~
By Mistress Ren

Intolerance and Ignorance        ~~ New 9-5-05 ~~
By Mistress Ren

Military Men and the Domme Who Loves Them: 
By Mistress Ren

The Ms. Boston Leather Experience
Luna shares her story

Respect and Tolerance
Respect and tolerance in the scene, by Mistress Ren and  LesVoiles.

S/m Isn't What It Used To Be
An essay on the contemporary S/m scene, By Keith L. Kendrick

To The Moon Alice! 
Submissive Women in BDSM - 1950's Revisited?  An essay by Kallen

The Top Ten Things the Government Can Be Doing With Their Time Instead of Cracking Down on Adult and Alternative Websites        ~~ New 11-29-05 ~~
By Mistress Ren

Walk ON
My Day in Pony Training, by Monorail the pony.

What A Day
My Experiences Servicing Two Dominants In A Photography Session, by Monorail the pony.

The Group Leader's Resource Corner:

Want to run a BDSM group or Munch?  It's rewarding, challenging, and sometimes just downright frustrating - what you need to know to get started, and deal with the complexities of the human spirit.  (Under Construction)

Some topics to be addressed:

Where Should I Hold my Munch?
How to Speak with Authority to Authorities
Problem Children in the Community
Ready for Fame? Group Leaders in the Spotlight


From the Mind of Mistress Ren
The Household Slave stories and other original tidbits.

Fun With Flagging
An 'essay' by Mistress Ren  <caution!  Humor ahead!>

Jokes and Songs
If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?

Ren's 'Ritings
A little vanilla humor from our very own Mistress Ren!!




The CUFSmaine Links Page
Our list of useful resources, reference areas and vendors.
While there are no pornographic images on the CUFSmaine site, we cannot promise you will not run into them if you follow links!  Please be aware that some links contain explicit BDSM imagery, nudity, and sexuality.


Meeting Potential Partners:

        A Primer For Male Submissives: What Female Dominants are REALLY Looking For
        By Mistress Ren

        Some Thoughts on Writing an Email of Introduction:  
        By Sonnet

        Finding a Partner: 
        By lafayetteNH

        Kinky Klassifieds
        Links to sites where to meet other BDSM folks!


Member "Submissions":

        Poetry, prose and short stories:
        Submitted by CUFSmaine members.        ~~ Updated 10-17-05 ~~


Munch Related Topics:
        New England Munches: 
        List of other munches in our area.

        What the Hell is a Munch?  
        A description of the CUFSmaine munch, history, and FAQ.  Various authors.

        How Do I Start a Munch? 
        This one is self-explanatory!  By Mistress Ren and LesVoiles


References and Other Resources:

Exposing Ourselves to the Media
News stories about BDSM

Words of Inspiration
Poetry, prose, and prayer geared to BDSMers



We have tried to make this the most comprehensive safety area we can.  If you have any comments or additions, please E-mail us and let us know!

        Online Safety
        By Mistress Ren and LesVoiles

        Telephone Safety
        By Mistress Ren and LesVoiles

        Things To Do Before Your First Meeting
        By Mistress Ren and LesVoiles

        First Meeting Safety
        By Mistress Ren and LesVoiles

        First Scene Safety:  
        By Mistress Ren and LesVoiles

        Safety Equipment and Suggestions:    
        By Mistress Ren

        The Maine Safe Call Network:  
        CUFSmaine members volunteering as safe calls for YOU. 

        Playing and Staying Safe - Six Thinking Points Before Playing with Someone New
        By Gloria Brame


Social Outreach:

About our Community Outreach Seminars
Basic Information for interested organizations and groups

BDSM Lifestyle: 
A Basic Analysis of The Sadomasochistic Lifestyle And The People Involved, by Mistress Ren.

BDSM vs. Abuse: 
Comparison prepared for Family Crisis Services of Maine, by Mistress Ren

"I'm Afraid to Go to the Emergency Room"
Maine Hospital Procedures for Alternative Lifestyle practitioners, Mistress Ren and LesVoiles

Sexual Assault/Stalking Prevention: 
Outline of instructional class presented by Mistress Ren and lafayette{Ren}, which includes personal protection information as well as hands-on defensive tactics that are useful in the event of an attack.


The submissives' Page:

Our resource center for experienced and novice submissives, including essays, educational material, and helpful links to other submissive focused websites and resources.  Under construction


Copyright Notice

All articles and materials on this website are the copyrighted property of Mistress Ren, lafayette{Ren}, CUFSmaine, Inc., CUFSmaine, Inc., and the individual authors
EXCEPT where otherwise noted.

No articles or materials may be reprinted without written permission by CUFSmaine, Inc., or the respective authors.  

Permission to reprint guest author's materials may be gained by writing to the Webmistress/Webmaster - we will then forward your request to the respective author.


Links to our site are always welcome and do not require prior permission.


Page Updated 11/29/05

E-Mail CUFSmaine!         Web Mistress:  Ren